I saw a "friend's" post today that said something to the effect that if you don't agree with Phil Robertson of A&E's Duck Dynasty and you're celebrating Christmas then you're a big hypocrite. Now I have no idea what Phil said nor do I care. I don't watch the program and I'm not looking to a "reality" TV star for spiritual guidance or any other guidance for that matter. I don't need Phil or anyone else to tell me what I should or shouldn't feel about homosexuality, marriage, patriotism or guns. I have a perfectly functioning mind of my own and frankly, someone who makes part or all of their living trying to convince people that their "reality" show depicts their real lives is a liar and shouldn't be taken at face value. Still it's hard to not feel annoyed and a little hurt by attacks on my faith for simply not agreeing with a guy that few of us can claim to know personally. Maybe because this is not the first time being a Christian who also believes in marriage equality has put me in a position to have my faith questioned. I haven't made a fortune on duck calls and if A&E made a reality show about my life, it'd be called Snot and Poop, but here's my opinion for what it's worth. It comes from my real life experiences, not staged or scripted.
Once upon a time, I sold hearing aids. I happened to sell a set to an older gentleman I'll call Dave. Dave lived with another man, I'll call him Paul. Dave and Paul were the first gay men I'd ever met and only the second and third gay persons I'd ever met, the first being a friend from high school. I remembered when she came out, how painful it was. She lost friends and even her family abandoned her. After living a lie for years, she could be who she truly was but they couldn't love her as she truly was. Still, I wasn't sure how I felt about homosexuality. I still cared about my friend but wondered whether what she was doing was 'ok'? Biblicaly speaking I mean. Then I met Dave and Paul. They'd met later in life, sharing a similar taste in books and both living discrete lives. It was only by accident that I found out they were more than friends. I'd arrived at an appointment a little early and they were having a moment together. It was sweet and tender and endearing and definitely not a moment that two 'old friends' would have together. After an awkward few moments, Paul became particularly interested in sharing their story with me. Dave had been married, even had a son but the marriage ended years earlier. He'd lived a life of solitude until meeting Paul and they were grateful to have each other. I would make a point to stop in (even though Dave's hearing aids didn't need service) because they were such graceful hosts and seemed happy to have a visitor with whom they could be themselves. I kept in contact with them even after I quit my job to go to school. Then one day, I called and Paul told me the awful news that Dave had pasted. I drove to see him and he told me a story that breaks my heart still today.
Dave had a stroke. Paul took him to the emergency room and the doctors did their best but he was on life support. When the staff asked about next of kin, Paul did what he thought was the right thing and gave them the names of Dave's ex-wife and son. That was the last time he was allowed to see Dave alive. The son and the ex-wife arrived, along with a brother, all people who had turned their backs on Dave when they found out the true nature of his relationship with Paul. Dave did not have a living will but he and Paul had spoken about what to do if something like this ever happened. Paul insisted the hospital keep him on life support to see if his condition improved but the doctor's hands were tied. The ex-wife, brother and son wanted him taken off life support and for Paul not be allowed anywhere near Dave, themselves or the hospital. What they did not know was that even though Dave did not have a living will, he did have a legally binding will and trust that left his assets to a few charities, and his 'dear friend' Paul. He did leave something for his son, but it was not the fortune they expected when they told the doctors to pull the plug. As Paul sobbed his regrets at not being able to say goodbye, I found myself weeping with him.
I know what Leviticus says but I also know that God put these experiences in my life for a reason. He opened my heart. I could've forgotten about my friend. I could've sold Dave hearing aids and gone on with my life but these people, their experiences, have made indelible impressions on my life. That cannot be mere chance. So yes, I was disgusted with Miley's performance. I may be Liberal but I'm also a feminist and a mother with good taste. And no, I will not change my profile pic to support Phil because the truth is, Phil will be fine without me and does not care about me. And yes, I'll celebrate Christmas and keep Christ in my heart, whom I need and who does care for me, not Phil.
Friday, December 20, 2013
Friday, October 25, 2013
An open letter to Governor Brownback and the Kansas State Legislature
I had abandoned this blog as having my children had rendered my heart considerably lightened. But as I lay awake wondering what the future holds for my family, I can't help but think these guys are real dillholes.
Dear Governor Brownback and the Kansas State Legislature:
My family's story begins at Pittsburg State University where my husband and I met and fell in love. After graduation, we moved to Olathe to start our big awesome careers and big awesome lives but it was 2008 and well, the economy was in the crapper. My husband, being a smart man, went on to achieve an advanced degree in hopes it would improve our chances. We bought a modest home in a smallish suburb, we married and grew our family by two more, Charlie and our darling Scarlet. With my husband and I and my daughter Taylor, we make five. We attend church. Our cars are almost 9 years old and we don't have cable. We recycle and we eat most of our family meals at home, around our table. I'm telling you all of this because I thinks it's important to know what kind of people we are. We are average Americans and Kansans and we are on the verge of financial ruin. Our very own fiscal cliff, if you will.
You see, almost three months ago now, our sweet Scarlet was born. We knew from prenatal tests that she would be born with Down Syndrome and another condition needing immediate surgery. She came almost five weeks early and was immediately transported to Children's Mercy. Scarlet had surgery the next day and spent the next seven weeks in the Intensive Care Nursery. Luckily, I had insurance through my job. Unluckily, it was a high deductible plan because some right-winged radio show host convinced my employer that if he didn't shop for cheaper insurance now, the rates would be astronomical down the road. Worse yet, Scarlet also has a heart defect that will require surgery. This defect makes her more vulnerable than most babies. An illness would almost surely mean another hospitalization. So I made the difficult decision to leave my job. I couldn't have afforded the child care anyway. The only problem is we can't afford COBRA and my husband had only recently started his new job. After five months of unemployment, he got a job. My husband has a MBA and he installs television and internet service, but that is a whole other tragic story. We aren't eligible for benefits through his new employer until February. So all five of us are now part of the 48 million Americans without healthcare coverage. 48 million and five.
I applied for coverage through the State of Kansas and was denied. I applied for supplemental coverage before, when I was pregnant and my husband was unemployed and we first knew all of this was coming, and was denied. We applied for mortgage modification and were denied. We applied for WIC and were denied. When the hospital social worker first spoke with us about applying for disability for Scarlet, who medically qualifies, I took one look at the financial qualifications and said "Why bother? We'll only be denied." In some cases, we miss the financial qualifications by $20 a month. So here we stand, on the edge of our fiscal cliff, below us is the safety net of public assistance, and in order to save ourselves, we must now swan dive into it. But what if our cliff was at the edge of a canyon and all we really needed was a bridge to get to the other side? A finite amount of help for a finite period of time. And what if you could build that bridge for us and the Federal government was going to give you money to build it, effectively making our swan dive totally unnecessary all while not costing you a penny? Well, we don't really have to ask "What if?" We already know the answer. You'd say "No." You already did. Under the Affordable Healthcare Act, Kansas would have received money to expand Medicaid coverage in order to cover the working poor and you said "No thanks."
Did I mention that I am a Republican? I voted for Obama this last time though. I don't ordinarily come right out with that but I think it's important that you know. I voted for AHA, I wanted AHA and we needed AHA. I know it probably isn't the perfect solution to this country's health care crisis but there are families, Kansas families, who cannot afford to wait until it is.
Sincerely
Kirstin Johnson
Dear Governor Brownback and the Kansas State Legislature:
My family's story begins at Pittsburg State University where my husband and I met and fell in love. After graduation, we moved to Olathe to start our big awesome careers and big awesome lives but it was 2008 and well, the economy was in the crapper. My husband, being a smart man, went on to achieve an advanced degree in hopes it would improve our chances. We bought a modest home in a smallish suburb, we married and grew our family by two more, Charlie and our darling Scarlet. With my husband and I and my daughter Taylor, we make five. We attend church. Our cars are almost 9 years old and we don't have cable. We recycle and we eat most of our family meals at home, around our table. I'm telling you all of this because I thinks it's important to know what kind of people we are. We are average Americans and Kansans and we are on the verge of financial ruin. Our very own fiscal cliff, if you will.
You see, almost three months ago now, our sweet Scarlet was born. We knew from prenatal tests that she would be born with Down Syndrome and another condition needing immediate surgery. She came almost five weeks early and was immediately transported to Children's Mercy. Scarlet had surgery the next day and spent the next seven weeks in the Intensive Care Nursery. Luckily, I had insurance through my job. Unluckily, it was a high deductible plan because some right-winged radio show host convinced my employer that if he didn't shop for cheaper insurance now, the rates would be astronomical down the road. Worse yet, Scarlet also has a heart defect that will require surgery. This defect makes her more vulnerable than most babies. An illness would almost surely mean another hospitalization. So I made the difficult decision to leave my job. I couldn't have afforded the child care anyway. The only problem is we can't afford COBRA and my husband had only recently started his new job. After five months of unemployment, he got a job. My husband has a MBA and he installs television and internet service, but that is a whole other tragic story. We aren't eligible for benefits through his new employer until February. So all five of us are now part of the 48 million Americans without healthcare coverage. 48 million and five.
I applied for coverage through the State of Kansas and was denied. I applied for supplemental coverage before, when I was pregnant and my husband was unemployed and we first knew all of this was coming, and was denied. We applied for mortgage modification and were denied. We applied for WIC and were denied. When the hospital social worker first spoke with us about applying for disability for Scarlet, who medically qualifies, I took one look at the financial qualifications and said "Why bother? We'll only be denied." In some cases, we miss the financial qualifications by $20 a month. So here we stand, on the edge of our fiscal cliff, below us is the safety net of public assistance, and in order to save ourselves, we must now swan dive into it. But what if our cliff was at the edge of a canyon and all we really needed was a bridge to get to the other side? A finite amount of help for a finite period of time. And what if you could build that bridge for us and the Federal government was going to give you money to build it, effectively making our swan dive totally unnecessary all while not costing you a penny? Well, we don't really have to ask "What if?" We already know the answer. You'd say "No." You already did. Under the Affordable Healthcare Act, Kansas would have received money to expand Medicaid coverage in order to cover the working poor and you said "No thanks."
Did I mention that I am a Republican? I voted for Obama this last time though. I don't ordinarily come right out with that but I think it's important that you know. I voted for AHA, I wanted AHA and we needed AHA. I know it probably isn't the perfect solution to this country's health care crisis but there are families, Kansas families, who cannot afford to wait until it is.
Sincerely
Kirstin Johnson
Thursday, January 31, 2013
I am what the political world calls a RINO, Republican in Name Only. I've been a registered Republican since 1998 and voted with my party in every election since then...except the last one. So disappointed was I in my party, that I voted the other way in nearly every single race.
What would it take for me to start voting Republican again?
1. Why is conservatism reserved for Christians? Isn't it plausible that Muslims, atheists, and Buddhists can all believe in strong families, fiscal prudence and small government/state's rights? Our country was founded on religious freedoms, shouldn't our party be?
2. Speaking of families, stop trying to so narrowly define what is and isn't a family. Blended families, families of mixed ethnic origin, grandparents raising grandchildren, same-sex parents, adoption, surrogacy and single parent homes all exist in today's world. Shouldn't we celebrate the fact that our unique culture allows these families to not only exist but to thrive? Isn't it our diversity that makes us great? If we don't all look the same, why should our families all be the same?
3. Roe v. Wade, let it go. It's been upheld for more than 30 years. Please stop wasting resources on trying to overturn it or passing legislation to circumvent it. Instead how about putting those same resources into helping women avoid having to make that kind of decision in the first place. Start by making sure that women have access to affordable contraception, including the Plan B pill. Allowing women and families to determine the timing and number of children is to empower women economically. No politician, doctor or pharmacist should be able to impose their religious beliefs on patients. Additionally, we need to work to ensure that women and young girls know their worth and have the confidence to take control of their sexual health. Rape victims should be protected while offenders need to be prosecuted swiftly and to the fullest extent of our laws. Sex education needs to be part of the curriculum in health education, not because it encourages sexual activity (which it doesn't) but because it's useful and important information for people to have. Just as a final note: not voting to pass an inclusive version of VAWA and saying incredibly insensitive and inaccurate things about rape, do nothing to dispel the War on Women accusations. Rapes do result in unintended pregnancies, they do occur on college campuses and they are not blessings form God.
4. Speaking of the War on Women, Pass the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act and the ERA. How can the U.S. reach it's full economic potential if over half of the population has one hand tied behind their backs?
5. Climate change is real and it's a problem, admit it. As much as we all hate to say it, Al Gore was right. I have no idea who said it first but "The great thing about science is, you don't have to believe in it for it to be real." Believing in science and religious faith are not mutually exclusive of one another. Lots of people have figured out how to rationalize the two within their own minds. I invite you to try and do the same.
6. Stop legislating for Big Pharma, Big Ag, Big Oil, the NRA, ad nauseam. Seriously, the gig is up. We know about lobbyist and how that works and we have a vague understanding of how campaign finance works. We also know there are politicians on both sides of the isle taking fat campaign checks to get elected and then returning the favor at the expense of the American people, the environment and sometimes the world at large. Citizens United is a horrifyingly bad piece of legislation. It undermines the very notion of the people's representation in government and democracy. At some point, someone is going to figure out how to win and election rather than buying it and then where will you be?
What would it take for me to start voting Republican again?
1. Why is conservatism reserved for Christians? Isn't it plausible that Muslims, atheists, and Buddhists can all believe in strong families, fiscal prudence and small government/state's rights? Our country was founded on religious freedoms, shouldn't our party be?
2. Speaking of families, stop trying to so narrowly define what is and isn't a family. Blended families, families of mixed ethnic origin, grandparents raising grandchildren, same-sex parents, adoption, surrogacy and single parent homes all exist in today's world. Shouldn't we celebrate the fact that our unique culture allows these families to not only exist but to thrive? Isn't it our diversity that makes us great? If we don't all look the same, why should our families all be the same?
3. Roe v. Wade, let it go. It's been upheld for more than 30 years. Please stop wasting resources on trying to overturn it or passing legislation to circumvent it. Instead how about putting those same resources into helping women avoid having to make that kind of decision in the first place. Start by making sure that women have access to affordable contraception, including the Plan B pill. Allowing women and families to determine the timing and number of children is to empower women economically. No politician, doctor or pharmacist should be able to impose their religious beliefs on patients. Additionally, we need to work to ensure that women and young girls know their worth and have the confidence to take control of their sexual health. Rape victims should be protected while offenders need to be prosecuted swiftly and to the fullest extent of our laws. Sex education needs to be part of the curriculum in health education, not because it encourages sexual activity (which it doesn't) but because it's useful and important information for people to have. Just as a final note: not voting to pass an inclusive version of VAWA and saying incredibly insensitive and inaccurate things about rape, do nothing to dispel the War on Women accusations. Rapes do result in unintended pregnancies, they do occur on college campuses and they are not blessings form God.
4. Speaking of the War on Women, Pass the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act and the ERA. How can the U.S. reach it's full economic potential if over half of the population has one hand tied behind their backs?
5. Climate change is real and it's a problem, admit it. As much as we all hate to say it, Al Gore was right. I have no idea who said it first but "The great thing about science is, you don't have to believe in it for it to be real." Believing in science and religious faith are not mutually exclusive of one another. Lots of people have figured out how to rationalize the two within their own minds. I invite you to try and do the same.
6. Stop legislating for Big Pharma, Big Ag, Big Oil, the NRA, ad nauseam. Seriously, the gig is up. We know about lobbyist and how that works and we have a vague understanding of how campaign finance works. We also know there are politicians on both sides of the isle taking fat campaign checks to get elected and then returning the favor at the expense of the American people, the environment and sometimes the world at large. Citizens United is a horrifyingly bad piece of legislation. It undermines the very notion of the people's representation in government and democracy. At some point, someone is going to figure out how to win and election rather than buying it and then where will you be?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
